I made a huge soap-opera grade mistake when I was in my later teens. While the behavior was…less than ideal, it was the lies to cover the behavior that led to so much more self-inflicted guilt and shame that left me standing for years in feelings that I was destined to be unworthy, unwanted and completely valueless.
Finally, after years of punishing myself, one day I simply decided that I would no longer “pay” for my bad decision-making skills in my teens. I would no longer allow myself, or anyone else for that matter, make me feel less than the beautiful, smart, loyal, amazing lady that I am. Instead of beating myself up, I began to affirm, in my mind, that I am worthy, I am loveable, and I am valuable. I began to respect myself and actually take steps to treat myself as worthy, loveable and valuable. More importantly, I forgave myself. Once I was on-board with a little self-respect and self-love, I began to attract respectful relationships that reflected back to me those desired qualities.
I share that significantly summarized story with you for one reason and that reason is this: We are not our mistakes.
At any moment we can make a different choice, we can choose a different path, and we can be a better person.
If you have been haunted by some less than ideal decision, or burdened by a cloak of guilt or shame that either you placed on yourself or that you feel was placed on you by others, choose to forgive yourself, clean up whatever mess you left, and then in the words of Taylor Swift, “Shake It Off.”
“If people refuse to look at you in a new light and they can only see you for what you were, only see you for the mistakes you’ve made, if they don’t realize that you are not your mistakes, then they have to go.”
― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free
The 2015 New Year promises bring grand hope. Hope that this year will be better than the last. Hope that this year we will be one step closer to accomplishing something even greater that we accomplished before. Hope that our dreams will finally be within our grasp. 2015 brings hope, but we must choose to bring our own sheer will and determination to turn our hopes and dreams into reality. Shake off that burdensome cloak of mistakes of years past and choose to affirm to yourself:
- I am not my mistakes
- I am not my bad decisions
- I am capable of so much more
- I am worthy
- I am so worthy of the all the love I desire
- I am so worthy of all of the dreams I have
- I am so worthy of becoming the successful person I know that I am destined to become
Make the commitment to repeating these statements over and over everyday until you really believe each and every one, until you know they are true in your heart, because dear one, they are. You are not your mistakes. What you are is worth the love.